IELTS: Writing Tast 1 - Line Graph

Line Graph - Task 1 in IELTS Writing test.
You should spend a maximum of 20 minutes on this task and write at least 150 words.

Example 1: (Source: ieltsbuddy.com)

The line graph compares the number of car thefts per thousand of the population in four countries from 1990 to 1999. 

Overall, it can be seen that car thefts were far higher in Great Britain than in the other three countries throughout the whole time frame.

To begin, car thefts in Sweden, France and Canada followed a fairly similar pattern over the first five years ,all remaining at between 5 and 10 per thousand. The general trend though for France and Canada was a decline in the number of vehicles stolen over the period, with both at around 6 in 1999. 

In contrast, Sweden experienced an upward trend, starting the period at approximately 8, and finishing at just under 15.

Interestingly, car thefts in Great Britain started at 18 per thousand, which far exceeded that of the other countries. It then fluctuated over the next nine years, reaching a peak of 20 thefts per 1000 in 1996, and ending the period slightly lower than where it began, at approximately 17 per thousand.

(Words 173)

Example 2: (Written by me, Please let me know if you find errors :) )

The line graph shows the proportion of population aged 65 and over in three countries including Sweden, Japan and the US from 1940 to 2040.

In general, there are upward trends in the proportion of population aged 65 and over in three countries.

To specify, seeing a increase from about 9 percent to 15 percent for the first forty years, the proportiob of population aged 65 and over in the US decreases slightly to about 15 percent for the second forty years, before a significant rise to nearly 24 percent for the third twenty years.

Meanwhile, In Sweden, after a rapid climb from about 7 percent to 14 percent for the first forty years, the proportion of population aged and over fluctuates between 14 percent and 20 percent for the second forty-five years, followed by a rise to about 23 percent in the last years.

Strikingly, after a slow decline from 5 percent to about 3 percent for the first twenty years, the proportion of population aged 65 and over in Japan increses slightly to 10 percent for the second seventy years, before a sudden rise to about 22 percent for the third ten years.

In brief, the proportion of population aged 65 and over in three countries increase at least 2 times in 100 years from 1940 to 2040. 

(Words 220)